Teaching Very Young Children to Share

This topic really hits home for me since getting my 2 and 3 year old to share is challenging.   As we hit the holiday season this topic is relevant since it can be hard to share new and very desired items.  Here are some tips to help deal with this important issue.

First of all we really need to understand and respect our child's difficulty with sharing.  Very small children are just learning about themselves and the world around them.  They can become very territorial  about their own items as they view there things as extensions of themselves.  They are also organizing their world and can become stuck on this is "mine" as well as this is "yours". My 3 year old becomes agitated when one of her older sisters uses the item of another sibling. This difficulty under standing that an item can "belong" to someone when someone else uses it will come with time and patience.

Some ways to facilitate sharing are:

Introduce the concept of turn taking.  Use a simple game that does not require a long wait for each turn to come.  You can use block stacking, doll feeding, or a similar simple task to talk about "your turn, my turn". Once this topic has been taught you can then use it for when it counts and your young child can understand that it will the her turn very soon.

When your child is having trouble sharing verbalizing and labeling their emotions around this challenge can be helpful. Letting them know that you understand how they feel and giving their feelings words will go a long way toward helping them through the process.

Provide a lot of positive feed back every time your young child shares something or takes turns nicely. She might not mind sharing her snack but might have hard time sharing a toy.  The positive encouragement she received from the "easier" sharing experience will help to reinforce her sharing with the "harder" expereince

Be prepared for play dates and neighbor and family visitors.  If you know that your child is attached to one or two particular items  respect that.  Remove highly desired items from the scene.  This will make sharing less challenging and easier to do.

Good luck to everyone and HAPPY SHARING!!!!